Birthday Party with Heart

One of our most cherished cultural traditions is to celebrate the date of a loved one’s birth with a party. For our kids, this tradition often begins when they are as young as 1 or 2. As parents, we want to see our kids honored in a way that is memorable and fun. Birthday parties are best known for fun themes; games; a cake with candles, a song, and a wish; and special playtime with classmates, close friends, and siblings.

And then there are the gifts. Typically, each party guest brings a gift for the birthday child, and often each leaves with a thank-you gift. The number of gifts trading hands in all the kids’ birthday parties across the country on any given weekend, let alone if we count the entire year, adds up to a number in the millions.

There’s an opportunity here, while kids are excitedly reveling in an abundance of fun, goodies, and new stuff, to appreciate how fortunate they are and to share a little with those who aren’t so fortunate.

When To Do It
The next birthday party you host for one of your children.

What To Do
As you plan your kid’s birthday party, consider having guests bring a donation, to encourage kids to make part of the party experience an opportunity to share with others.

What to Donate: Cash or a Book

1. Explain to your “birthday kid” that you’d like to include in the party a fun way to give something to those who have less.
2. Decide whether you prefer that the donation be books or cash.
3. If you choose a book donation:
   • Let your kid know you would like to ask all the party guests to bring a book to donate.
   • Pull out a number of your kids’ books. Talk about the books they have and about kids who may not have any books.
   • Help your kid identify one book to give away at the party.
   • Help your kid choose which organization should get the books. If necessary, you can suggest a doctor’s office, the hospital, an after-school program, or some other appropriate organization in your community.
4. If you choose a cash donation:
   • Talk to your kid about the idea of sharing part of their birthday abundance with kids who may not have very much.
   • Let your kid know you would like to ask all the birthday party guests to bring a small cash donation — $1 to $5 — and that your kid gets to decide which organization will receive the money.
   • Explain that your kid will still be receiving gifts, but they may be a little less lavish, because the guests will also be giving to the charity your kid chooses.
   • Help your kid choose which organization should get the donation. You can suggest an animal shelter, children’s hospital, a food bank, or some other recognizable organization in your community.
5. Have your kid decorate the donation box (for books) or jar (for cash), including putting the name of the organization on it.
6. In your party invitations, include a request for each guest to bring a book (new or used) or a small cash donation, which will go the “xxx” charity your child has selected.
7. Place the donation box or jar near the entry to the party so guests can easily deposit their donations as they arrive.
8. Before the party ends, have your kid thanks guests and share where the donation will be going.
9. Pick a day to deliver the donation with your kid; consider recording it on camera and revisiting that movie (or pictures) on future birthdays.

Now, let’s get this party started!

Things You Will Need

• Jar or box
• Pens, pencils
• Scissors
• Colored paper
• Tape or glue

Talk About It
After the party, when things have calmed down, ask your kid whether the donation idea worked. Did any of the friends who came ask why your kid was doing this? Is it possible that some of them may try this on their birthdays? After you have made the donation, ask whether your kid would be interested in doing it again on the next birthday.

Tips on Tipping

What exactly is a tip? Who decided on the rules that go with how much and for what? Why are the rules different for each kind of service? And why do the rules for tipping vary by region, culture, and country?

As you might image, the ambiguous world of tipping is a bit perplexing to kids. Take tipping in a restaurant. Has you child ever gone back to the table to grab the change you left for the wait staff because they thought you forgot your money? How can you help your kids learn the general principles of tipping—and that tips need to be considered in the cost of certain activities such as eating in a restaurant?

When To Do
Dining out

What To Do
Next time you get ready to pay the bill in a restaurant, get your kids involved in determining the tip.

If you have never involved them, start here

• Let your kids know that the people who have served your food earn a living (in part) from tips, the money that diners voluntarily give above the cost of the meal.
• Let your kids know that it’s normal to leave a certain amount, about 10-15% of the cost of the check; although, a person may choose to leave more or less, depending on their satisfaction with the service and personal preferences (or values).

When at the restaurant

• Teach your kids how you determine the tip amount.
  • Share why you chose the amount you did.
  • Make it very clear what your criteria is for the current tip’s calculation.
  • Ask if they agree or disagree with your decision.
• Calculate the amount based on your decisions.
  • Because young kids won’t be able to figure percentages in their heads, you may want to bring a calculator along for this purpose.
• Have your kids help you count out the tip money to leave on the table.

Things to try at home

• Put your kids in charge of rating service and calculating tips as part of their contribution to the family.
• You can also practice with your kids at home. Have them serve you a meal and present a bill, so you can calculate and give the tip. Or reverse the game to find out how your kids value your service!

What You Will Need

• Calculator
• Paper and pencil (to create “restaurant bill”)

Talk About It
Talk about other services that typically include a tip, for instance, room service in a hotel, or a haircut. Do you use the same percentage tip rule for these other services? Why or why not?

Wish List

Have you ever dreamt of owning a really fast car – or taking a month-long vacation – or buying season tickets to the ballet? As adults, we have savings goals that often require some pretty big sums of money to fulfill our wishes. We have learned to save to buy a home, maybe start our own business, or be ready for a long retirement. It turns out that those who are successful in meeting financial goals are really good at saving money. And we’re willing to bet these folks got into the habit of saving money early on. Like, when they were kids!

So where do you begin with your kids? Unless they were born with frugal genes, they probably prefer spending money to saving it. Now, there’s nothing inherently wrong with wanting material things. Having a goal serves as incentive for achieving it. So let your kids dream of things they want, as long as they understand that it’s up to them to make it happen.

When To Do

Some evening after homework is done

What To Do

Your kids can learn to become more determined savers by having their own savings goals. The key is to set and reach short-term goals so your kids develop the savings habit.

1. Compile a wish list – aka a set of savings goals – with a second column for costs. The wish list is just another way of writing down financial goals on paper.
• Help your kids write a list of the things they want, today. Tip: include some small, inexpensive items for early successes (see step 2).
• Help your kids rank their items in order of importance, from high to low.
• Help them come up with a ballpark cost for each item and write it in the cost column next to the item.
• Post the wish list on the fridge or some other very visible spot, so you and your kids stay focused on the goals.
2. Chart a course to make those wishes come true – help your kids map out a plan to save up the money.
• Start with the least expensive goal on the list, because it will take the shortest amount of time to reach – ideally, just one or two weeks. Early success is key to starting the savings habit.
• If your kids get an allowance, determine how much of it you will let them use toward their savings goal – this will set the length of time to reach the goal. Optional: offer to match their savings to help shorten the time it takes to reach a goal.
• If your kids do not get an allowance, consider giving them a small amount of money each week, earmarked for helping them practice saving and reaching their goal. They need money in some form to practice building the saving habit.
• Have your kids track their progress on the wish list each week until they reach the goal.
• Once they reach the goal, take them shopping to get their wished-for item. And celebrate the accomplishment of reaching the goal!
3. Set the next goal, and continue to support your kids as they reach more and more short-term savings goals.
• When you get home from buying the first item, or soon afterward, take out the list again and select the next goal to begin saving for.
• You know your kids best, so keep the length of savings time appropriate for their ability and patience. One- or two-week goals for a five-year-old may be just fine. This may be the right level for your kid for an entire year. Be patient; the rewards will outweigh any of the small frustrations of the early habit-setting period.

What You Will Need

Paper/pencil
Magazines for ideas
Calculator
Patience

Talk About It

Did your kids find it easy to come up with things they wanted? Did they find it hard to wait until they had enough money to go shopping for their coveted item? Did they think of other ways they could get more money, like doing extra work to help out around the house?

Acts of Kindness

Valentine’s Day, February 14th, is a fun day for both young and old! More than just a day for romantic couples, it can be a day to celebrate friendship and kindness, and to show our appreciation for all who are dear to our hearts.

Because young kids are concrete thinkers, it can be hard for them to understand an abstract concept like kindness that can’t be represented by a physical object. However, by noticing when people around them give to others, offer their help, or take actions that make others feel comforted and loved, your kids can learn that "You are kind" means so much more than three words inscribed on a Valentine’s candy heart.

When To Do

Valentine’s Day, or any quiet afternoon

What To Do

Here are four kindness activities you can try with your kids this Valentine’s Day — or any other time during the year!

Here are four kindness activities you can try with your kids this Valentine’s Day — or any other time during the year!

1. Card Kindness
   1. What would Valentine’s Day be without pretty cards? Help your kids make cards of Kindness for those they appreciate in their lives.
   2. Help them identify ways in which their friends or family members have been kind. If they have trouble coming up with examples, give them some hints. (Hint for parents: take a little time in advance to recall some of these acts of kindness, so you’re ready to jog your kids’ memories!)
   3. Once they have some ideas, help them make cards thanking these special people for the various acts of kindness.
   4. Help them decorate with red paper, doilies, and stickers, or glue on candy hearts.
   5. You can suggest they also describe the kind act in writing — people love knowing that their kindness was noticed and remembered.
       
2. Special Gift Kindness
1. As your own budget allows, give your kids a special gift budget to buy small Gifts of Kindness for a few of the kind people in their lives.
2. Help your kids pick out items that mean something special to each of the people they have chosen. Suggest they remember gifts that they themselves have particularly enjoyed and treasured, and think about why they feel that way.
3. If they have money left over, suggest they treat themselves to a Gift of Kindness — or save the money for something more special later!
    
3. I Spied Kindness Box
1. Decorate an empty box with fun heartfelt images. Close it and cut a slot in the top.
2. For a one-month period, ask you kids to be on the lookout for acts of kindness.
3. Have them describe each kindness on a sheet of paper (the youngest kids may need your help with this), and drop it into the I Spied Kindness box.
4. At the end of the month, open the box and spend time reading aloud all the acts of kindness.
5. Give your kids a Gift of Kindness for all their hard work of noticing when people do kind things to others.
    
4. Kindness Jar
1. Have your kids decorate a Kindness Jar to fill with spare change that your family will collect for a month. (Kids will love to watch the jar fill up day by day.)
2. At the end of the month, help your kids sort the coins into coin roll wrappers and decide where they would like to donate the money.
3. Take them to the chosen charity and let them hand over the contents of the Kindness Jar.

What You Will Need

• Colored paper, doilies, stickers
• Candy hearts
• Jar Box (a shoe box or candy box is a good size)
• Scissors
• Tape, glue

Talk About It

Was it hard for your kids to find people who were kind? How many people do they know who are kind? Did they find it fun to do the activity you choose? Do they think they are kind?

Holiday Budget Setting

The annual holiday shopping season is once again upon us. It seems to come around faster every year, doesn’t it? And this year it seems that most Americans are in no mood to overspend. Nearly two-thirds of consumers said the economy would affect their holidays, according to a National Retail Federation survey, with 84.2% of those respondents saying they would spend less.

So how about your household? Do you have your holiday budget set? Will you approach holiday preparations, parties, and gifts differently than in past years? How are you going to involve your kids in this year’s holiday season? Do you have plans to teach them some new ways to enjoy gift giving and holiday celebrating without spending more than they meant to?

This holiday season find a way to engage your kids from the beginning. This is one of the best times of year to help your kids become great stewards of their money. Share your best budget strategies for having a happy, festive holiday season that won’t leave you with a January shortfall.

When To Do It

A quiet Saturday or Sunday afternoon

What To Do

Set your budget

1. There’s no special or secret formula for how much you should spend on the holidays. You can use last year’s budget as a starting point. (If you didn’t have one last year, now’s your chance to create one!) If you’d like a new approach, consider basing the budget on some portion of your household income after taxes. Some experts suggest three days of income should be enough for one holiday season.
2. Once you’ve set a budget, make a list of everything you plan to spend money on. Include gifts, travel, party costs, and decorations.
3. Jot down the approximate cost of all the items on your list.
4. Now the hard part: are your list and budget in sync? Can you afford the items on your list, given the budget you’ve set? Make any needed adjustments before you involve your kids.

Set the kids’ budgets

1. Using your budget as a guide set aside the specific dollar amount you want each of your kids to manage this holiday season.
2. Determine exactly which items each kid will be responsible for with his or her holiday money. For example: sibling gifts, parent gifts, school party gifts.

Help them plan gift purchases

1. Let your kids know about their holiday budget(s) and what they will be responsible for this year.
2. Help them think of a few gift ideas and jot down their approximate costs.
• You can take them online or to the store to check out prices.
• Discuss the option of making gifts vs. buying — remind them that even making gifts will involve some costs.
3. Have them adjust or revise their shopping list based on the price check exercise and their decisions whether to make or buy each gift.
4. A simple shopping list/worksheet can help them keep track of the gift items and costs at home. It’s also a handy tool to help them manage their budget while out shopping.
5. Consider setting up an incentive plan to reward them for staying on budget or coming in under budget. You make these financial or fun activity rewards. For example:
• One free movie pass if they come in under budget
• $5 for every $5 they come in under budget

This is the time of year when retailers pull out all the stops to overcome your budget concerns. So be ready to cheer on your kids’ budget efforts as you all navigate this holiday season. Keep that list or worksheet in hand on shopping trips, whether to the shops or online. The whole family will find this really helps them to stay on top of spending — and makes it more fun learning along the way. Practice really does make perfect!

What You’ll Need

• Calculator
• Paper and pencil
• Computer with online access
• Time for price check store visits

Talk About It
What do your kids think about being responsible for their own holiday budget? Do they like the responsibilities? What surprised them the most in estimating costs for gifts and other expenses — and adding them up?

Follow The Money

Parents tell us that it is not always easy to engage their kids in conversations about money. Sometimes they just forget to explain a money decision while out on a shopping trip. Either they don’t have time to explain, or they just don’t want to engage their kids in a particular money decision because they feel it would be too hard.

There’s an alternative and very effective way to engage your kids in money conversations, one that feels more neutral and less weighted with family baggage: reading books together. You can choose a comfortable time for reading, when things are quiet and your kids are paying attention. Reading together often leads to more in-depth discussion and exploration of money topics.

One of our favorite books for fun, engaging money conversation starters for young readers (age 4 through 8) is Follow the Money by Loreen Leedy. The book follows a day in the life of a quarter, starting from being stamped out at the U.S. Mint and making a full circle – being spent, lost, donated, and many other adventures – all the way back to the bank the quarter started out in after it was minted.

When To Do It

Bedtime reading, Saturday or Sunday quiet time

What To Do

Follow the Money offers lots of money starter topics for you and your kids. You can choose one subject as a jumping-off point or read the book from cover to cover. We recommend that you read it through once, and then revisit the book when you have a new need to explain a particular money topic, or if you encounter a real-life lesson to be learned that could be supported by revisiting the book.

Quick Synopsis

The book creatively uses money to indicate page numbers, and walks young readers through these money basics:

·      Which presidents are on the coins and bills

·      How much money is in different rolls of coins

·      Understanding coupons and sales

·      How much you get back in change when you use different currency to pay different prices (addition and subtraction)

·      Different ways you can use money

You’ll recognize a few of the Money Wizdom budget basics:

·      Planning to save up enough for a toy

·      Spending money on treats for yourself (OK as long as you have the money set aside)

·      Donating some of your money to those in need

What You Will Need

The book Follow the Money

Time(s) to read all or parts

Talk About It

If you first read the book from start to finish, you can ask your kids to tell you what they learned. Have them share their favorite part of the book and why they liked it so much. You can also ask which was their least favorite part and why.

Kick the Habit and Save!

With the holiday season less than two months way, wouldn’t it be nice if you and your kids could free up a bit of extra money to have for gifts this year?
If you stop to look at the numbers, you’ll see that some of your family’s daily indulgences can add up to big bucks. Perhaps it's grabbing bottled water or juice to throw into your kids’ lunch boxes each weekday, or frequent runs to the neighborhood coffee shop or workplace vending machine. Or those magazines that keep arriving in the mailbox, full of great ideas — but you never seem to have time to get to them. 
What if your family gave up one or two of these habits and used the extra money to start a holiday fund? Along the way, your kids can practice trade-off decision-making — and more important, they get exposure to the costs of these little habits.

When to Do
Saturday or Sunday afternoon

What to Do
The key is to look at the little habits you and your kids indulge in, and then make some choices, so small conveniences don’t take such a big bite out of your family budget. 

Track What You Do:

1.    Record what you and your family eat, drink, and do for two days in one week. Record everything!

2.    We suggest one school day and one weekend day so you can capture the biggest possible list of family “indulgences.”

3.    Have each of your kids keep track of everything they eat, drink, and do for the days you’re tracking. It will be helpful to give them a simple worksheet to fill in:  Breakfast, Lunch, After School, Dinner, Sports, Errands/Shopping Trips, and so on.

4.    Be sure to include things like magazines, newspapers, online games, and other small, recurring weekly or monthly expenses you might be able to live without.

Make Some Decisions:

1.    Gather everyone together and review the information you’ve collected.

2.    Put the possible “kick the habit” items on a list. Estimate the cost of each of the items on a monthly basis.

3.    Look at the top contenders and their associated costs. See if you and the kids can agree on which item or items to give up.

4.    Once you pick an item or two, calculate the savings you will add up between now and the middle of December. You can use this money for a holiday gift fund!

5.    Consider putting the money in a labeled jar on the kitchen counter to remind the kids how their actions are adding up!

6.    Talk about how you all might spend the money. Donate it? Share it? Buy a special gift for grandma or grandpa? A gift for the whole family?

What you will need

Paper, pencils/pens

Calculator

Talk about it

Were your kids surprised by how many little things you splurge on each day and how much they cost? Was it hard to pick things to give up? Would your kids be up for doing this once a quarter to see whether they can find more habits to kick?